Ramps joins elite list

Published : Aug 23, 2008 00:00 IST

The Oval is the home of Mark Ramprakash who manages to hit his 100th century and it is only appropriate that he joins this line since the Daddy of all century makers is Jack Hobbs, also of Surrey, writes Ted Corbett.

August 4: So England choose Kevin Pietersen — he of the bracelets, the pop singer wife Jessica, the tattoos, the apartment in Chelsea Harbour, the exotic hair-dos, the strutting walk, the succession of lovely ladies, the colourful casual clothing, the extravagant strokes, the crouching stance with the knees bent just before the bowler reaches the crease — to replace Michael Vaughan as captain. Mind you, some of the other 77 England captains stand out in a crowd. Tony Greig, also born in South Africa, is 6ft 7in; 16 are born abroad (Freddie Brown in Peru, Douglas Jardine in Bombay, Ted Dexter in Milan); Brian Close has a very low handicap whether he plays golf right or left-handed and the Hon. Lionel Tennyson is grandson of the poet and, if he disapproves of the tactics out in the middle sends his batsmen a telegram. I suppose KP can always text his hurry-up messages.

August 5: The current South African players are not best friends with Pietersen. They think he has too high an opinion of himself, do not approve of his rush to England and probably wish he is in their team. I can only count half-a-dozen Boks who even pretend to be attacking batsmen. Barry Richards, Roy McLean, Herschelle Gibbs are the best known and of course KP will fit into their dull machine perfectly. They call him The Ego until this week when they change it to Captain Ego and the least friendly call him SIGJAD for Say I’m Gorgeous, Just Adore Me. It’s an Afrikaans word indicating arrogance. Giles Clarke, chairman of the EBC and another man who rates his own opinions highly, announces that he signs a new agreement with Sky for exclusive rights to show Test cricket — nay, almost all cricket in this country — and then criticises the terrestrial broadcasters for failing to bid for the rights. As you know, I have a long memory and seem to recall him saying to Channel Four, whose cricket commentary is much admired, that “you need cricket more than cricket needs you.” You will notice how neatly that phrase trips off the tongue and how memorable it is. Perhaps Channel Four still have that thought in their minds when they refuse to bid for any package and maybe the BBC think they do not wish to be added to the numbers who need cricket more than it needs them.

August 6: Tony Greig is also born in the Republic before he comes to England in the 1970s and is captain from 1976 until he joins the Packer Revolution. There are intelligent, forward-thinking, usually liberal cricket people in this country who think better of Robert Mugabe than of Greig. Yes, 30 years on. They think he is a traitor because he joins Kerry Packer while he is captain and they bristle at his TV commentary. They don’t know — they will have heart attacks if they do — that some 10 years ago Greig has a yen to be chairman of the selectors in England. He sees nothing wrong in the idea and encourages me to write the story. I think better of it — but just imagine if Greig, an impetuous man, is chief selector. There may be Darren Pattinson incidents every week.

August 7: The Oval is the home of Mark Ramprakash who this week manages to hit his 100th century. It is only appropriate that he joins this line since the Daddy of all century makers is Jack Hobbs, also of Surrey. Ramps, a very serious man but just about the politest and most concerned cricketer of this era, never makes it as an England batsman. Stage fright is the generally accepted explanation but nevertheless no one argues with the Surrey chief executive Paul Sheldon when he calls Ramprakash “the outstanding batsman of his generation.” Ten of those who have made 100 hundreds are still alive — Geoff Boycott (151), Graeme Hick (135), Graham Gooch (128), Tom Graveney (122), Viv Richards (114), Glenn Turner and John Edrich (103), Dennis Amiss (102) and Ramprakash — so naturally he is pleased when Boycott, Gooch and Edrich join him for a photograph during today’s play.

August 8: The fall-out from Michael Vaughan’s farewell continues. Geoff Miller, the national selector, goes to Trent Bridge, maybe to apologise to Darren Pattinson for the way his inclusion in the side is handled and the keenest journalists prepare to write “I was there from start to finish” stories of the rise and rise of Kevin Pietersen. Vaughan takes a rest before he resumes with a reluctant Yorkshire who feel that they have enough trouble already without having to include an out-of-form No. 3 in their batting line-up. Vaughan is determined to take his time before plunging himself into the hurly-burly of cricket media. He turns down an offer to commentate on the one-day series. “One day,” he says in between bowling underarm to his boy Archie who is born three months after Vaughan’s England regain the Ashes, “but not just yet.” Yorkshire, by the way, have some good news. Their 20-year-old leg-break and googly bowler Abdul Rashid takes seven Nottinghamshire wickets. “He’s not ready for the Test team yet,” says an authoritative voice, “but when he is you will see he can bowl, bat and field.” Sounds like a big improvement on Monty Panesar, an admirable left-arm slow bowler, but a fielder who still gets ironic cheers from the crowd if he picks the ball up cleanly.

August 9: I happen to think that Andrew Strauss, the only other cricketer with a serious chance of taking over leadership of the Test team, is unlucky. He keeps his thoughts to himself but there must be dark moments when he comes to believe his life will be much different if the selectors do not choose Andrew Flintoff as captain in Australia in 2006-7. Strauss is the right man for the job, but the glamour surrounding Freddie makes the selectors think he is the answer. Perhaps he is the man; but don’t say it too loudly as his team loses 5-0. If Strauss is captain I reckon he will score a lot of runs out there and come back to this country with his honour intact even if the Ashes are stolen back perhaps 2-1.

August 10: Finally, I just wish to put the record straight. In all the millions of words written this week about the changeover at the top it seems as if Vaughan fails to get the best out of some players, his tactics do not suit others and he shows what a cry baby he is by his performance at his last press conference. So I just wish to remind everyone that he wins 25 of his 51 Tests as captain, a record surpassed by very few around the world and the best success rate by any England skipper since 1877. He is also polite, helpful, welcoming and astute. Not a bad record by any standards.

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